well. i did it. i ran 5 miles. it wasn’t pretty.
i ran with a head cold, a stomach-ache, and a fresh set of blisters that cropped up around the 2 1/2 mile mark (i guarded the feet with vaseline, band-aids, and gauze– but the blisters STILL made an appearance).
and that darn baby actually got out of bed BEFORE me and was wrapping up his run when we started (darn baby). i officially have zero street cred. and the mocking can begin. the baby is the winner. i bow to the baby.
but, believe it or not there is a running phenomenon out there just as pride-busting as a kicked-back baby chillin’ in a jogging stroller. this one is as elusive as big foot– but, i can attest to it’s existence and the power it yields over weaker runners such as myself. i speak of the one and only nearly nude.
so. here’s how it all went down.
there i am “running”– with intermittent episodes of sniffing, snorting, and wiping my nose on my shirt (i’m hard core like that)– when a mature man of at least 50 years old passes me wearing NO SHIRT, NO SHOES. that’s right– this week i got clocked by an old guy wearing an ipod, shorts, and nothing else.
he took me down like i was standing still– i mean i know i’m slow– but seriously? seriously.
I CANNOT MAKE THIS STUFF UP!
i believe God is enjoying my running and uses it as his saturday morning entertainment– i am TOTALLY God’s comedy central– i am the Lord’s “running joke” !
first the baby, now the nearly nude– so far there’s definitely been laughter (at my expense) through the pain.
next saturday i tackle 6 miles on the comic tragedy that IS my long run.
wonder if there’s such a thing as a shirtless, shoeless baby that runs long distances.
if there is– Lord, the joke’s on me.